KK: Well welcome to yet another Sunday Night Survival. And if ever there was a time that I was surprised to see it this is tonight. I mean I thought for sure the HWA was done for.
TB: Yes let’s give you the sad news to start off the show. Last week Survival was to be held in Mental Mark’s backyard but alas that never happened, as the house was burned to the ground. At first it was believed that everyone save Sean Moore and Grimjack perished. In fact myself and Keith here just barely got out ourselves. Later we found out that Fudge escaped safely as did Mark although he suffered third degree burns all over his body.
KK: But we hate to be the bearer of bad news, HWA legends Kevin Conner and Jason Craven didn’t make it out alive and both died.
TB: No bodies were found as nothing could survive that inferno, but with no signs of them it’s to be assumed that they didn’t make it out. Our condolences go out to the families of both men.
KK: Despite that though the HWA isn’t closing, we’ve been through terrible losses before, maybe not this bad but we’ve always regrouped and this is no exception.
TB: Fore the second time in a month we were sworn to secrecy as to our location. As you can see we’re in an underground parking lot, I’m not sure why but I’m worried about what the HWA has become in a recent weeks, playing in backyards and now parking lots, well it’s better than nothing, I’m sure we’re just in a rough stretch. But tonight should be the end of all that because-
"Bring Me To Life" by Evanescence hits over some loud speakers by the ring and the crowd puts there hands together as none other than Brian Carter comes walking out and gets in the ring with a mic.
KK: That’s the last person I expected.
Carter gets in the ring and has a mic as the crowd dies down.
Carter: First off let me introduce myself, I am Brian Carter one of the top cruiserweights in HWA history. Now let me express my sadness for Kevin Conner and Jason Craven. But welcome to a new era of HWA. I sat at home watching things go down, I thought to myself the HWA needs me. Not for wrestling, I’m still injured. But they need my leadership, now more than ever. Grimjack can’t do this all alone, so I’m the new commissioner of HWA.
KK: Carter is commissioner? I don’t know . . .
Carter: Now then. Some of you may wonder where we are. That’s a secret. No one will be setting us on fire if they don’t know where we are. Also, you may have noticed that this is the HARDCORE Wrestling Alliance, but the matches are hardly ever hardcore! That changes now.
TB: Carter means well but . . .
Carter: So get ready to witness the return of the legend Fudge take on the HWA champion Sean Moore, my friend, and newcomer Buck Naked who is accused of the arson at Mark’s house which cannot be proven. But first watch the greatness that is Mental Mark vs. the returning Alex Mysterio. After these messages.
Commercial Break.
The scene returns and we see Grimjack sitting in his black Honda in the parking lot apparently away from everyone else. He’s drinking some kind of mixed drink when suddenly Brian Carter comes along and knocks on the window. Grimjack unlocks the doors and Carter gets in and sits in the passenger seat.
Grimjack: Welcome to my office.
Carter: How did I do Grim?
Grimjack: Huh?
Carter: My announcement.
Grimjack: Oh! It was great, yeah.
Carter: I know I’ll never live up to Conner’s legacy Grim but I just wanted to say it’ll be an honor working with you.
Grimjack: Oh.
Suddenly Fudge walks up and gets in the car and sits in the back which is a tight fit in the Honda.
Grimjack: Hi Fudge. What can we do for you.
Fudge: Look Grim me and you haven’t seen eye to eye for a while, I don’t know what you had to do with that fire, I don’t know why you’re still in charge of HWA but I only want one thing and that’s the world title.
Grimjack: I think everyone knows that’s what you want Fudge. What’s your point?
Fudge: In the past you’ve always found some way of interfering in my matches and keeping me from winning that belt. I haven’t forgotten you costing me the win in my match against Diamond. Now it seems like you’re pals with this Buck Naked character . . . if you try anything . . .
Grimjack: I’m definitely pals with the guy, we’re still investigating his involvement in the fire . . . hey I lost my best friend Fudge. Don’t you try talking down to me.
Fudge: Whatever. Just letting you know.
Suddenly Sean Moore gets in the car and scrunches up next to Fudge in the back. He has a backpack with him which probably has his three title belts in it.
Moore: Hey guys. What’s going on?
Carter: Hey Sean how’s it going?
Fudge: That bag looks a little heavy Sean. Don’t worry I’ll lighten your load for you tonight.
.Moore: Ha sure you will Fudge. Good luck though man.
Grimjack: You guys make me sick.
Fudge: What was that?
Grimjack: Sorry man but you two are fighting for the world title, I mean there should be a little more urgency. I hate when guys are all buddy buddy.
Fudge: I may act civil to Sean now but I’ll be all business in the ring, and I will kick his ass. Don’t worry about that Grim, I actually agree with you on that.
Moore looks a little scared because he idolized Fudge growing up.
Carter: Yeah Fudge? Well you’ve had a great career no doubt, you’ve even beaten my ass I admit it but the only person in this car who you haven’t fought yet is Sean, and there’s a reason why he has three of the four belts in HWA right now.
There’s a knock on the window of the car and everyone turns to see the huge Buck Naked standing there.
Buck: You haven’t ever fought me either.
Fudge and Moore immediately get out of the car and get in Buck’s face but Grimjack and Carter get out and get in their way.
Grimjack: Wait for the match guys.
Fudge: Why wait?
Grimjack: If you guys fight there will be no match.
Moore: I don’t care he destroyed my friends house and put him in the hospital, this ends now.
Moore tries to push through and get to Buck but Fudge gets in his way and pushes him into the car.
.Moore: Fudge what are you doing?
Fudge: I want that belt Sean. Sorry but business is business.
Moore: This is unbelieveable.
Moore walks away pissed. Fudge turns to Buck.
Fudge: As for you, you’re a joke. I have no idea why you’re even in this match. You’ll see what happens when you fuck with the HWA. This is my house “Buck”.
Fudge turns and walks away looking confident. Buck looks at him as he walks away.
Buck: We’ll see about that.
Buck walks away. Grimjack and Carter look at each other like “whew that was close”. The scene goes back to ringside.
TB: I do have to wonder, when has someone gotten a world title shot in his very first match? Buck Naked is making an impact whether anyone wants to believe it or not. As you may know Sean Moore said he saw him running from Mark’s house, so it is thought that Buck had something to do with that.
KK: I think we should give the guy a break, innocent until proven guilty I say.
"Hit The Floor" by Linkin Park plays and Alex Mysterio comes walking out and gets in the ring, looking focused.
KK: I’m really glad he’s back, I’ve missed his antics.
"Juggalo Anthem" by Blaze Ya Dead Homie hits and Mental Mark comes out to loud cheering. He has bandages over his arms and legs from the burns still. He’s holding his teddy bears though.
TB: This man was brought to life by shocking his heart just last weekend, now he’s out here about to fight in a hardcore match. My god what bravery.
KK: I’ve just been given word that since Conner is, ahem, unavailable to defend his hardcore title the winner of this match will be the new hardcore champion.
TB: So I guess this really will be hardcore then.
The bell is rung and Mysterio and Mark start circling each other. Mark charges but Mysterio gets a drop toehold. Then he moves with quickness and gets Mark in a headlock before he can get up. He hits Mark with a knee to the throat and Mark is clutching his throat. Mysterio grabs Mr. Bear which everyone knows is weighted and goes to hit Mark with it and connects.
TB: Mysterio using Mark’s weapons against him.
Mysterio pulls Mark up and starts punching him then he irish whips him into the corner. Mark is stunned and Mysterio hits a running clothesline. Mysterio starts pulling Mark’s bandages off his arm.
TB: This is disgusting.
Underneath the skin is all raw and burned. Mysterio starts punching the skin and Mark yells out in pain. This wakes him out of his stupor and Mark starts battling back. He grabs Mysterio and tosses him from the ring.
TB: I guess Mysterio didn’t do his scouting on Mark or he’d know that Mark feeds on pain.
Mysterio is lying on the hard pavement outside the ring and Mark gets on the turnbuckle.
KK: Don’t do it Mark!
Mark jumps off and hits the Mind Bender on Mysterio. People can be seen exchanging money as everyone is betting on Mark now. Mark covers and Cunningham the ref is there to count . . . 1 . . . 2 . . . no Mysterio kicks out somehow. Mark pulls Mysterio to his feet and drags him over to a parked car and rams his head through the window shattering the glass. Mysterio has blood pouring down his face. Mysterio lays him over the hood of the car and gets up too, he sets Mysterio up and powerbombs him right on the hard metal. He covers while still on the car . . . 1 . . . 2 . . . Mysterio kicks out again.
KK: Mysterio is looking great here despite these great moves by Mark. I mean he’s been known to workout like a fiend.
Mark is getting pissed. He scoops Mysterio up again on the car and gets him on his shoulders. He goes to give him a Breaking Point F5 off the top of the car but Mysterio somehow lands on his feet. Mark gets up looking shocked to be met with a boot to the gut. Mysterio DDTs him into the car.
KK: Holy shit Mark’s head totally dented that car door!
Mysterio covers 1 . . 2 . . but no Sean Moore is there and breaks up the count stomping on Mysterio.
KK: What the hell?
TB: Moore is Mark’s tag partner, Mysterio should know this is a hardcore match and anything goes.
Mysterio is up and pissed he grabs Moore but Moore slides out and kicks him in the nuts. Mark is up and he grabs Moore asking “what the hell are you doing I don’t need help”. Moore is trying to explain himself as Mysterio is seen on the ground slipping some brass knuckles out of his pocket. He gets up and smacks Moore with them and then Mark. Then he covers Mark 1 . . . 2 . . . 3! Mysterio is handed the hardcore title and is holding his hands high as the fans boo.
KK: Mysterio couldn’t have asked for a better return winning the hardcore title.
TB: And Mark and Moore may have a rift building between them. We saw the beginning of this when they had to fight each other right after winning the hardcore title and Moore won. But these things happen in the heat of battle, we all saw Moore’s concern for Mark’s life at the fire and him wanting revenge on Buck Naked.
KK: Should be interesting going into our next match, if Moore can recover from the brass knuckles!
Commercial Break.
The scene opens back up and Grimjack is seen at a hotdog stand in the parking lot buying a hotdog. He’s going through his wallet for money to pay for it.
Grimjack: Damn . . . I guess I’m a little short. This is kind of embarassing.
Hotdog man: You have to pay.
Grimjack: I know just give me a minute man.
Suddenly a voice is heard.
Voice: I got this.
Grimjack: Wait I know that voice.
Grimjack turns and there’s none other than Unknown Ninja in full masked glory holding a five dollar bill.
Grimjack: Whoa! WHOA! Ninja! How the hell are ya?
Ninja: As still as the breeze.
Grimjack: Wow where have you been?
Ninja: Everywhere. No where. Inconsequential. Are you in need of finances?
Grimjack: Huh? Yeah man I’ll pay you back.
Ninja hands the money to the hotdog man and takes the chane back.
Ninja: Forget about it in the grand scheme it means nothing. But I would like something from you in return.
Grimjack: What?
Ninja: A match. Next week.
Grimjack: Wow you got it!
Unknwon Ninja turns without a word and disappears into the night leaving Grimjack dumbfounded. But then he starts eating the hotdog.
KK: What a weird guy.
TB: This is huge Keith, HWA legend Unknown Ninja is returned.
TB: Folks the HWA world title is on the line here!
Smooth by Carlos Santana hits and Buck Naked comes walking out to loud boos looking cocky.
TB: I want to see if this guy is everything he says he is.
KK: He’s a six time world champion Trent.
TB: Yeah in other feds.
Buck is in the ring just leaning against the ropes waiting. "Meet the Creeper" by Rob Zombie hits and Sean Moore comes running out from behind a row of cars and tosses the world title down and slides into the ring. He immediately starts trading blows with Buck Naked.
TB: Moore had to wait per Grimjack’s orders but he’s allowed to get his revenge now!
KK: But Fudge isn’t here yet so he should have to wait! Cheating!
Buck Naked is surprised but then recovers he gives Moore a knee to the gut then goes for a powerbomb but Moore falls over and lands on his feet behind Buck. Buck turns and swings but misses a punch. Moore goes for a german suplex but Buck proves to heavy and lands on his feet himself. He grabs Moore and hits a hard belly to belly suplex.
KK: Did you see that series of moves? Buck knows his way around a wrestling ring.
"Whisper" by Evanescence hits and Fudge comes running out looking readu and slides into the ring.
TB: It’s great and a privelege to see the great Fudge in action again.
Buck Naked rushes Fudge with a clothesline but Fudge ducks it and hits the FUDGE U on him.
TB: Jesus the FUDGE U right off the bat on Buck and Buck is stunned.
Moore gets up and hits Fudge from behind with a flying lariat. He pulls Fudge up but Fudge recovers and pushes his hands off him. He kicks Moore in the knee and Moore goes down to one knee. Then Fudge hits a drop kick right to Moore’s head knocking him down. Fudge looks over to Buck and makes a cover on him but Buck kicks out after one. Fudge runs jumps up on to the ropes and somehow stands on it.
TB: Amazing balance, how can he do that? He’s mocking Buck.
Buck gets up and starts to rush Fudge, Fudge sees this and jumps off the ropes hoping for a drop kick but Buck was smart and stopped and Fudge lands hard on his face. Buck scoops him up and hits a back breaker on him as Fudge is holding his back in pain. Buck starts stomping on his prone form. Buck sees Moore starting to get up and runs over with a running big boot that turns Moore out. Buck looks around at his fallen opponents and sneers like “HWA ain’t nothin”.
KK: What a force destroying all comers in his debut match for the HWA title!
TB: It’s very far from over and look Fudge is up.
Buck handed expected Fudge up so quick and Fudge hits him with a drop kick to the knee. Buck goes to one knee bringing him to Fudge’s height and Fudge bounces off the ropes and hits a spinning DDT on him. Moore gets up and goes to punch Fudge but Fudge catches his arm and puts it behind Moore’s back and then hits a belly to belly like that crushing Moore’s arm behind him. Moore flies across the ring and into the ropes then he uses the ropes to pull himself up, his leg and arm injured so far. Buck is over there too and Buck and Moore are close to each other so Fudge runs off the ropes and hits a drop kick with both legs out so that it hits both Buck and Moore and they fly out of the ring and land on the hard pavement.
TB: Fudge is putting on a show here and I guess he didn’t have too much ring rust huh Keith!
KK: The only Fudge I knew would have won by now, I swear he’s lost something.
Moore is laying on the ground and Buck is starting to get up, Fudge hops onto the turnbuckle and is looking down like now which one do I want to destroy. The crowd is chanting “FUDGE FUDGE” and Fudge leaps off looking for the Fudge Splash on Moore but Buck is up and grabs him out of the air and uses his momentum to throw him through the windshield of a nearby car.
KK: Did you see that Fudge just went through the windshield! He’s devestated!
TB: Of course I saw it. I’m right here.
KK: You’re just mad that you’re idol Fudge is going to lose now.
TB: He’s not my idol!
KK: Whatever.
People in the crowd can be seen exchanging money as no one wants to bet on Fudge now. Moore is up and heading towards Buck to fight but Buck is holding his hands up like wait. Moore is confused and Buck is saying “we should team up against Fudge he’s too much”. Moore thinks about it and shakes his head nah and kicks Buck in the nuts. Buck goes down hard and Moore hops onto a car and leaps off with a leg drop. He pulls Buck up and tosses him into the ring thinking about a cover obviously. Buck is getting up and Moore tries to grab him but Buck pulls Moore down and Moore bangs heads with Cunningham the ref and Cunningham is down.
KK: The ref is out!
Moore is shocked at what happened. Buck is starting to get up still hurt. As soon as he’s up Moore gives him the Kiss My Foot Superkick and Buck falls to the mat devestated. Suddenly though "REV 22:20" by Puscifer hits and everyone is shocked when Jason Craven runs into the ring and slides in with a bat and smacks Moore across the head.
TB: Oh My God! Jason Craven! I thought he was dead! And why in the hell is he attacking Sean Moore dammit!
KK: He wants his title back! He never lost it, Grimjack gave it to Moore because he thought Craven died! But Craven is back for what’s his!
Suddenly "Juggalo Anthem" by Blaze Ya Dead Homie hits and Mental Mark and Brian Carter come running down and slide in the ring and charges Craven. He hits Carter with the bat knocking him out but Mark gets through and tackles Craven down. Craven kicks Mark off of him and as Mark is up charging him again Craven gets him on his shoulders and hits a spinebuster. Craven raises his hand and points down at Moore as he leaves the ring.
KK: Craven letting his presence known! Thanks god he’s alive and ok but I wonder what happened to him?
TB: Maybe this means Conner got out too, well we’ll see. But look at this, Buck Naked is slowly recovering oh my Fudge is getting out of the car look at all that blood on him. He can barely walk.
Fudge got out of the car but fell down having lost a lot of blood and is weak. Wallace Cunningham is up and sees Moore, Buck, Mark and Carter down in the ring and a bat but he doesn’t know what happened. He slowly is regaining his senses and he sees Buck use his last energy to put his arm over Moore.
KK: Buck is covering Moore! Count Cunningham! We’ll have a new champ!
Fudge hears the crowd getting louder and looks up to see Buck covering Moore. Using his last vestige of power he gets to his feet and limps to the ring. Cunningham crawls over and starts to make a count which is slow since he’s hurt. 1 . . . Fudge climbs onto the apron and sizes up the situation, seeing he has little time . . . 2 . . . Fudge hops onto the turnbuckle with his old agility suddenly back . . . he hits the Fudge Splash on Buck breaking up the count a split second before the three count. The crowd is going nuts and everyone’s trying to bet on Fudge again.
TB: How is that even possible. Buck had this one won I admit it.
It took everything out of Fudge and now all three men are down.
KK: Who recovers first will win. That will be Buck.
TB: I doubt it, Buck hasn’t so much as twitched since that Fudge Splash and Moore is starting to stir.
Moore is up and he sees Fudge starting to get up. He sees his chance and readies himself for a Kiss My Foot on Fudge when he gets up. Fudge is up and turns around and out of the corner of his eye sees Moore foot coming.
TB: Watch out Fudge!
Fudge ducks it matrix style somehow and in his position sees a chance for a move, he leaps up and wraps his arms and legs around Moore’s leg and pulls him to the ground. He starts twisting Moore’s leg and suddenly has Moore in a makeshift submission move.
KK: I can’t believe this! Fudge never does submissions!
Moore is in great pain especially since he hurt the same leg earlier in the contest. Cunningham asks him if he submits and Fudge twists as hard as he can Moore’s leg. Moore shakes his head no but then it’s too much and he has to tap against his will. Cunningham calls for the bell and Fudge hears this and let’s go.
TB: I can’t believe it, Fudge somehow survived being thwon through a car window and won the HWA world title for an unprecedented fifth time!
KK: I admit that is impressive. But give credit to the newcomer Buck Naked for taking it to these guys.
TB: What about Sean Moore! He might have had this won if not for Jason Craven!
Mark and Carter are helping Moore up. Moore looks over to Fudge who has the world title. He walks over and it’s quiet for a moment. Then he puts his hand out and they shake hands as the crowd applause.
TB: This is a great moment.
KK: This is tragic.
Buck Naked is up and just watching looking pissed. Someone hands him a mic.
Buck: Wait just a minute. I hate to break up the celebration but I can’t stomach this anymore. I demand a rematch Fudge. You know you got lucky and you’d never beat the Buck a second time. But I want to show you how much pull I got to make that happen. I’ll show you who brought me to the HWA . . . and who helped me set that house on fire!
”Purple Haze” by Jimi Hendrix hits.
TB: No it can’t be.
KK: I knew it!
The lights go out and a spotlight goes on and a man is seen standing on top of a car with a mic. It’s David Jackson and everyone is booing.
Jackson: That’s right I set this all up, Buck is going to help me take over the HWA again and that fire should show you how serious I am.
TB: That bastard murdered Kevin Conner then!
Jackson: Now I have a special announcement . . .
Suddenly though Grimjack ran over with a barbwire bat and smacked Jackson down off the hood of the car and then smacked him two more times to everyone’s delight except for Buck Naked’s Grimjack tosses the bat down disgusted and picked up the mic.
Grimjack: No I have an announcement. Well two actually. First this is what happens when someone fucks with the HWA. My HWA. Second . . . I want all of you to keep your calendars clear three weeks from now . . . because there will be a last man standing . . .
Scene fades out.